Monday, March 21, 2016

Working through anxiety

My anxiety has always been pretty bad. I was on medication for it, for years. But when I got pregnant, I had to stop cold turkey. It was awful coming off of it. So much so, that my doctor doesn't want to put me on anything else.

I go through long periods where I don't have any anxiety. The past few months have not been one of those times. The combination of trying new medications and brain chemistry, I've been a mess. 

Anyway, the past few days have been extra bad. Today, I woke up and decided we needed a change. At least for the day.

I explained to Sweet Pea, as we were both waking up, that we weren't going to watch TV today. She was going to get to play with her toys, or she could use her tablets, but no TV. She seemed to understand. 

We've listened to music, and had a dance party. I opened all the curtains to let in what little light there is, and turned off most of the artificial light. I just want a nice calm feeling. I desperately need to get a diffuser. I think that would help all of us, immensely. 

Sweet Pea is now quietly playing. She has asked quite a few times to watch Caillou or the Baby Movie (Inside Out), but I calmly tell her that we're not watching TV today, and she goes back to playing.

I can already feel my anxiety going down. I don't know how long I'll get away with this, but for right now...it's wonderful. 

As of late, Sweet Pea has also been terrified of monsters :( It's to the point where I'm not allowed to leave the room, at all. Even to go to the kitchen, where she can see me. She's scared of the "toe monster" and the "couch monster". Bedtimes were getting hard, which they never were before.

Before I was even pregnant, I told myself I was going to use "monster spray" when my child got to this stage. Lavender and water, in a spray bottle. It keeps the monsters away, and helps the child sleep.

We started using a few days ago, and she's been sleeping SO much better! She only wakes once or twice a night, instead of four or five times. Not to mention, she'll actually go to bed now. 

We spray it on the windows, so the monsters can't get in. On Sweet Pea's pillow, so she has good dreams. And on her tootsies, so she sleeps well. Works like a charm. Another reason I want to get a diffuser, I'm thinking it would help both of us sleep better, if I diffused a little lavender. 


She is such a sweet girl, and puts up with so much. I don't know how I got so lucky, to get such an easy going kid. She whines, like most kids...but she's really low maintenance.